Friday 29 May 2015

Torment

This morning I sat down to journal with the Lord for the first time in a little while and the first words that came to the page were:

Me: Father God, I need you
God: I AM right here daughter.
Me: Amen, may that be the truth.
God: Why do you need Me right here?
Me: Because my life doesn’t make sense without you.
God: Bur you know I AM always with you right?
Me: Yeah, but there is a difference from knowing in my head and knowing in my being, in my heart, in the way I breath, speak, spend, laugh, play, work…

Then the next thoughts that came seem somewhat unrelated, but bear with me and I will attempt to make a connection…

Do not be anxious about anything, what you will eat or wear or where you will sleep! Instead with thanksgiving, praise and supplication offer up all your requests and a peace that surpasses all understanding will fall upon you! 

That is my version of Jesus’ words from Matthew 6, combined with Paul’s words from Philippians 4.

“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. (Matthew 6: 25-34)

“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4: 4-7)

As you can see my version is a little off, but it has the same spirit behind it. DO NOT WORRY, DO NOT BE ANXIOUS ABOUT ANYTHING!

You may be asking, what really anything!? But I have this huge paper due, i have bills that I can’t pay, my mother has cancer, how can you tell me not be anxious, not to worry? That is not fair, it’s not possible.

My worries and anxieties are fairly light but never the less I am being disobedient by worry6ing, I am saying to God you are not good or big enough to take care of me, you don’t love me enough to take care of me…

Worrying and being anxious is a problem because it is being disobedient, but this morning I was reflecting not that maybe that’s not the most important thing, that its being disobedient, rather maybe we need to think about the promise that comes with not being anxious, not worrying…

“the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” 

What!? I can give away my worries and anxieties, hand them over to my Father God with rejoicing, thanksgiving, prayer and supplication (earnestly and humbly) and receive peace that will protect my emotions and thoughts from the torment of worries and anxieties! 

This is HUGE people! HUGE! 

OK so I promised you a connection…

I have been feeling a distance from God in my emotions and in my thoughts, because I have not been giving over to Him on a daily, regular bases in rejoicing, thanksgiving, prayer and supplication (earnestly and humbly) my worries and anxieties … I have been allowing my worries and anxieties torment me, rather than receiving the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus!

Amen!

What about you? Are you being tormented? Do you stay up late at night worrying? Do you feel sick to stomach with anxiety and dread? This is not a magical formal, it is about having a relationship, a two way communication with your Heavenly Father who loves you dearly and wants to guard you with his peace.