Wednesday, 22 April 2015

A King?

Before you start reading this please take heed that these are just some preliminary musings, so please read them with a grain of salt, that being said come let us muse together…

The other day my dear friend was praying with me and she shared with me Isaiah 54 focusing on verses 11 and 12:

Afflicted city, lashed by storms and not comforted,
    I will rebuild you with stones of turquoise,
    your foundations with lapis lazuli.
I will make your battlements of rubies,
    your gates of sparkling jewels,
    and all your walls of precious stones. 

Considering I have described my current situation like being on a roller coaster ride that I can’t get off of, and how much I love sparkles! These verses were encouraging and I made a mental note to read the whole chapter. 

Before I had a chance to read it, a couple days later Connally Gilliam (she is one of my new most favourite people, check out her book: Revelations of a Single Woman: Loving the Life I Didn't Expect) was speaking on singleness. I have to confess I was dreading it, as being single is one of those storms that are lashing me at the moment, and the prospect of being single for life haunts me, so I thought here we go again someone going on about what a great blessing it is to be single, that’s great for them but I don't want to hear it, I don’t want to be single for life, did you hear that God!? Not me choose someone else, I don’t want it! Please… 

Connally was a breath of fresh honest air! She spoke from the heart with truths that she has had to wrestle out herself over the years of being single. She did not paint some idealistic picture of singleness but she gave a honest and realistic portrayal of how one women has come to a place of peace, and believe it or not, thriving in singleness. You might be wondering what does this have to do with Isaiah 54, oh right sorry I got side tracked. Connally read part of Isaiah 54, a different part then my friend had read:

Sing, barren woman,
    you who never bore a child;
burst into song, shout for joy,
    you who were never in labor;
because more are the children of the desolate woman
    than of her who has a husband,”
says the Lord. 
“Enlarge the place of your tent,
    stretch your tent curtains wide,
    do not hold back;
lengthen your cords,
    strengthen your stakes.

As she read, I thought oh there is Isaiah 54 again, oh I don’t think I like these words as much, I don’t want to be a barren woman who has no husband! God I want a husband and children! 

Despite my resistant, Connelly’s words sunk in deep and I spent the next day or so chewing on them. The next morning I even journaled “OK maybe single would not be the worst thing ever… but I still want to get married and have a family.” Haha progress! Finally a couple days after hearing Connelly speak I read all of Isaiah 54, and to be honest it felt kind of like a slap in the face: “For your Maker is your husband” (vs. 5). What!? No! I am sorry God but I want an earthly husband! I know in my head that you are better than any earthly husband could ever be, but other people get both you and an earthly husband, I want both too! Please?

OK this is where the musing comes in… promptly after writing that, the question came to my mind “am I being like Israel in wanting an earthly king?”

Do you know the story? Read it in 1 Samuel 8, the gist of it is that Israel wants an earthly king just like everyone else, even though they have God the perfect King, and God warns them of the troubles that an earthly king will bring, but they insist and so God concedes and gives them what they want, an earthly king, and although they do have some good kings they have a lot of really bad ones… 

This is by no means a perfect comparison, because a husband is not the same as a king, God does not warn us against getting married as he did with having a king, marriage is a beautiful union that is blessed by God ... buuut in 1 Corinthians 7 Paul warns us “those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this” (vs 28). Again I am not saying getting married is in any way a bad thing (I still want to get married!) 

My musing is that maybe I am pushing for an earthly husband, and God is saying to me (at least for the time being) but Maria I am you Husband, and in marrying you will face many troubles… maybe I need to stop fighting for what I think I need and trust that God knows what I need and that he has my best intentions at heart, and that he is not withholding good from me, as “we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him” (Romans 8:28)… Either way I am single right now, and marriage is not the be all and the end all, I need to chose to focus on who and what I do have in my life, and what and who is the be all and the end all…

“For from him and through him and for him are all things.
To him be the glory forever! Amen.” (Romans 11:38)

Do you have an "earthly king" desire or even demand in your life?

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